I wanted to share my story about my pregnancies…I couldn’t have another abortion i couldn't have another abortion jessicas_story

The first time, I was young. I had my mind made up about who I was going to be and nothing, including that baby that was growing inside of me, was going to stop me from having the life that I wanted. I was way too young for that. Fourteen years old and pregnant didn’t feel so great, but it was my reality. So, what did I do? I did what people suggested. I got rid of it. I had an abortion and I went on.

Then, the condom broke and guess what. There I was again, facing this same situation. I was pregnant again by the same person, my boyfriend. What kind of stupid luck was this?? He was trying to do his thing on the basketball court so that he could get a college scholarship and possibly go to the NBA. He really is THAT good. But, what college was going to take him, me, and a baby?

So, I did what I knew to do. I worked and got some cash together, and made abortion my choice again. My parents didn’t know I was pregnant only a few friends. It didn’t feel so good or so “right” this second time. I felt like I had let myself down or that I was being very cruel and irresponsible in some way.

The second abortion was physically more traumatic for me. I became really sick after the abortion procedure. It was not as simple as the first time, when I was kind of surreal about the whole thing. This second time, I felt more of a “connection” with the baby that was inside of me. But, I was made to feel that it wasn’t going to be “good” for me or the baby if I kept it. So, not only was I physically ill, I was experiencing some sort of emotional “sickness” too. It was really terrible.

My boyfriend was there for me before the abortion. He even suggested that maybe we should have kept the baby. But, it was a done deal and I was the one stuck with these weird and sad feelings of abandonment and anger for making such a quick and poor decision. It was not as simple as I thought it would be. In fact, the abortion was one of the worst decisions that I have ever made in my life.

So, here I am, years later in my final year of college, about to graduate…with honors. I’m still with the same guy. He got that scholarship and he may go to the NBA. Plus, get this…I’m pregnant…again. Just when we are about to start our new lives, it has happened again. But, you know what…I can’t have another abortion. I won’t do it. I told my boyfriend about being pregnant. Yes, he was not “happy,” but he also was realistic. Believe it or not, he said to me, “You can’t have another abortion. It wouldn’t be right.” Whoa! Could this be? We were on the same page at the same time. We both knew that it was time to face the music. It was time to deal with the cards that life had dealt us. It was finally time for us to see, hold, and love our child.

I didn’t have another abortion and I vowed that I can’t and won’t ever have another one. My baby girl is here. Beautiful, wonderful, and mine…this child has helped me and my husband. Yes, we got married, before our baby was born and before either of us graduated from college. He did not go to the NBA, but we have been so wonderfully blessed with a perfect family and a great life. If I had gotten a third abortion, this life would not have been. I’m so glad that I didn’t have another abortion. I’m so glad that my baby is here. I’m so glad that my life is what it is and that I now know that abortion is not the only option. I chose life…a fabulous and fantastic life…for me, my baby, and our family.

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