Can My Mom Raise My Baby?
“My mom can raise my baby,” is what one girl said. She was very serious and very nonchalant about it. Then, there was that other girl in my math class. She said the same thing, “My mom can raise my baby.” What? Did these people hear themselves talking??
You go, get pregnant, and then decide that your mother, who I might add, was not involved in the whole baby-making process, has to take on your responsibility and raise your child. To me, it sounded so selfish. I just couldn’t get with that way of thinking.
Then, it happened. I got pregnant.
It wasn’t planned and I definitely was not the happiest person in the world when I realized that I was pregnant by someone that I don’t even love. But, this was a situation that I just couldn’t change. I just had to deal with it.
I have to be honest, the thought passed through my mind. I found that I was like those selfish girls at school, and I thought to myself, “My mom can raise my baby.” It was a fleeting thought and when I considered everything, I was actually embarrassed to even think such a thing. I had to really think about my options…all of them.
I had already decided that abortion was out. No way was I going to be responsible for killing an unborn baby. In my heart, I just felt that it was not a good thing to do. Plus, I know people that have had abortions and they have some really bad horror stories that they shared with me. Some told me how they bled a lot after the procedure and another girl told me that she kept having these terrible dreams of her baby screaming. Another girl told me that it was the worst decision that she had ever made and that she was forced into it by her boyfriend. I was determined not to be like them, and I was also determined that nobody was going to tell me what I should do. I made the decision to “do the deed” and now I would have to be responsible.
For a moment, I thought that I might keep the baby. I started thinking of all of the great things that I could do with my child, but then, I realized that I’m still a child myself. I don’t feel like an adult and I don’t really think like an adult, to be honest. This, of course, I would never share with my parents. But, I know that I’m not that responsible. I’m only in high school. Should I think like someone much older? Not sure if I should, but I know that I don’t.
So, when I thought about keeping the baby, the only other thing that I could think was that my mom could actually end up raising my baby with me. My baby might become more like my sister or brother! No way. That was not going to work. Plus, I felt that I didn’t have much to offer a child at this point in my life. I had to definitely consider my other options.
I met a lady at the clinic that talked to me about adoption. She talked to me about the different types of adoption and how I could be involved in the process. She explained to me that I could help to select who I wanted my baby to grow up with. If you are wondering what adoptive families are like, click here to check them out. I could help to give my child a great start and a potentially fantastic life, kind of like in the movie Juno.
Of course, it meant that I had to actually have the baby. But, I was actually alright with that part. I understood that part. This situation could be a real life or death situation. I decided to go with life and I wanted to make sure that my baby would have the best life possible.
My next move was to work with an adoption counselor to make the final arrangements. I did it and I felt pretty good about it. There is so much that I want to accomplish in my life and I felt bad thinking that my mother would end up raising my baby. So, I made, what I feel, was the best decision, for me and this baby.
I know my life is going to be better because of my decision and I know that this baby’s life will be better, also. I’m proud that I took responsibility for my actions. I really didn’t want to hear myself saying to anyone, “My mom can raise my baby.”